L.Xiuting

title: Ending. Move On.
date: Saturday, December 31, 2011
time:3:04:00 PM

Another year ending. Time to move on.

Just so unbelievable that a year just went by and remembering all the anxiety this year when starting my new poly life. There were A LOT of down times. All the tears that have been teared. The feeling of lost. I hope 2012 would be a better one, and may thing last a bit longer. Things are not the same now though. I just feel that some people leave and don't really look back. Did they really meant it when they say that they missed you but then on the other side, they are happily enjoying with their lives? I don't know. It's ironic. The way you sound. Because we didn't, you did.

May we all strive for the best in 2012 !

P.S.: Just heard about Katy and Russell getting divorce. Hollywood, why do you always not give any hope for love?

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title: 339273
date: Saturday, October 22, 2011
time:11:31:00 PM

Don't let me bring me hopes up when you are just going to drop it from high anytime.

Labels: 339273

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title: 17th
date: Sunday, October 16, 2011
time:11:53:00 PM

A few more minutes and I'm gonna be 17. My awesome clique have organized a surprise BBQ for me at Ruyan's. Stayed over at Ruyan's and got to talk about stuff. I love the AMAZING GIFT and the effort they put in for this BBQ. :') Can't believe another year is over, but I still feel the same. Thank you for those who attended the BBQ and let me have those enjoyable time. :) I LOVE MY CLIQUE and I have to say that their 'photo's' kind of surprise me. Haha! Ahhh.... I miss those old good times. :)

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title: Gym!
date: Wednesday, October 12, 2011
time:10:11:00 AM

I am so tired right now. My arms are aching and my feet is in pain. :( Should go swimming rather than gym this Thursday!

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title: Changing
date: Friday, September 23, 2011
time:4:04:00 PM

Everything move so fast and feel that I am still at the same spot, same position.
Yet, I was back to yesterday, dreaming once again.

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title: At triscilla's
date:
time:12:15:00 AM

Enjoying my holiday ahhhhh. School re-opening soon and I can't access my Leo account.... I WANT TO GO SWIMMING TOMORROW.

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title: Somehow
date: Wednesday, June 22, 2011
time:2:33:00 AM

Somehow...

Sometimes we just miss the same old stuff that we used to do and who we did it with.

However, some of the people are not able to move one.

While others are already far beyond them.

Realizing how things around me change so fast makes it hard to accept.

We're not who were, emotional feelings being invoked.

The time we had, to some, were just insignificant.

But somehow it didn't work the same with me.

Whenever I walk, I look around.

On this journey, people found new present and forgotten much about the old past.

However, there will always be few of people among the crowd, walking alone.

Because their feeling never left the past, never wanting it to be a history.

As what they felt was different from what they feel now.

Labels: looking back

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title: Impatient
date: Thursday, June 9, 2011
time:9:29:00 PM

Yeah... That's me.

Labels: freak out

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title: Thoughts, Feelings, Emotions.
date: Wednesday, June 8, 2011
time:11:02:00 PM

I was having insomnia yesterday night. I couldn't fell asleep.

Crazy things were running through my mine.

Time have pass soooooooo fast that sometimes I which that it will just slow down.

Many things happen to me personally for these few months.

Everything seems so different from before and a year back.

It is scary to me that how people changes.

Through the night, there was this thing that stuck in my mind...

"Who is there for me? Who so I ever lean on to cry out all my worries and problems?"

I was asking myself, have anyone ask if I am okay?

All these emotions and feelings just came rushing to me last night at a shot.

I could kept it anymore, so I poured out all my tears.

I understand that people come and go in my life and it is something that cannot be changed;

And most of the people change.

But what I only want is to know that there will be a person that will always hit my mind when I am feeling down and have no one to turn to.

But last night, no one came to my mind.

I feel that my life is so empty. :(

Labels: ..

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title: Heart
date: Monday, May 9, 2011
time:11:21:00 PM

I wish that my heart is bulletproof so that I won't get heartbreaks and feel the pain anymore.

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title: Moon
date: Sunday, March 20, 2011
time:2:24:00 AM

Are you looking at the same moon as I am right now?

Because you have to wait for another decade or so to see this.

I hope by then, I'm not alone to spend this beautiful moment.

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title: Only asked once.
date: Thursday, January 27, 2011
time:2:45:00 AM

Sorry that I didn't directly answer to that question that night,
although I was dying to tell you.
However, my heart ache at the same time as you leave and tried to return again.
Your flirtatious nature drive me to jealousy.
I could take it because I don't have a great heart.
I told you the answer was not important anymore,
as you were attached then.
What for if I answer honestly to you that night?
Would that change anything?
I don't wanna destroy the relationship you guys have.
And at the end, I just found out that we're not mean to be.

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title: Weird Dreams.
date: Saturday, January 8, 2011
time:12:24:00 AM

5th Jan 2011,

I had a dream. We were walking down the street near my house that night.
We were talking like we knew each other for ages.
I was tired then, from all the work and stuff.
So I wanted to go home, you followed.
Then, you were just right there.
Sitting by my bed.
You were copying my notes, although O level is long over. (WEIRD)
I was looking at that familiar face.
I would've remember that sight forever.

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title: Christmas is not always a good day.
date: Wednesday, December 22, 2010
time:12:06:00 AM

Christmas is coming very soon. People filled with excitement, ready to enjoy this very special day with their love ones. To me, it is still a normal day. I still have to work and before I knew, Christmas is gonna end already. I got to work till 7pm and its so late. Probably I should just catch a movie and grab a coffee? Or should I just....go to the beach? Or should I just sleep and let it pass? But all these doesn't matter right? Cause I am gonna spend this Christmas alone again.

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title: Dreams
date: Wednesday, December 15, 2010
time:1:51:00 AM

Continuously dreaming of you. I always woke up and tell myself, it is really just a dream. It feel so real yet it is so impossible.

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title: Forgetting you.
date: Friday, November 19, 2010
time:12:14:00 AM

I am trying. Just give me some time. Thankyou.

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title: Hold on tight.
date:
time:12:13:00 AM

Hold me tight like this.

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title: SMILE.
date: Thursday, November 18, 2010
time:8:54:00 PM

I'm going to smile through all this.

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title: Aqua....
date: Saturday, November 13, 2010
time:3:15:00 PM

Seriously, I should be giving up hope by now already.

There are so many proof that is pointing to her, not me.

I know it's never gonna change.

What if I would have answer your question that time?

Understand, it would change anything.

Because if you do love me, you wouldn't have been soo....

disappointing.

Labels: dfgwesrgre

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title: You.
date: Saturday, October 23, 2010
time:12:20:00 AM

Now I am alone in this journey, without you.

Today I dream of you. It was so real, that I want to stay in that dreamy world forever. Its been long since I dream of you. People once said that if you dream of that person, he/she must be thinking of you too. Did you took so long to think of me? :/ I don't know. Maybe I didn't even cross your mind after all. I cannot feel your presence when you promised to be by my side. Whenever. And whenever I need a shoulder to lean on, you will be there. You asked me to feel it when you're not there, but I really didn't feel any support. You said you love me big time, is that still possible now? Maybe it's just plainly my fault. Maybe I shouldn't be such an asshole. But I just love you too much that I don't know how to behave straight when I talking to you. Also, I remembered that you once said that you love me enough to hurt me. I don't believe that it's real, but I do believe that I love you enough to hurt myself. I hope after all, after you've gone, you'll come back with a new self 10 years later. Maybe at that time, we can sit at starbucks, have some coffee and talk about our past and presents. Dreaming of you make it even harder, by the way. I can really feel your touch and I felt so secure in the dream. I remember that we were dating and my sister saw us. So I hold your hand and ran. And I remembered vividly that you hugged me. That is the only think that I remember the most.

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title: My Birthday
date: Sunday, October 17, 2010
time:11:41:00 PM

Thanks for everyone who accompanied me on my birthday today. I really appreciated. Thanks for tolerating my guilan-ess. :D I can be too crazy sometimes. Love you guys!! (L) It's okay that my BNN cmi! After O level there will still have another celebration right?! :D I hop there is! Love Ang Huisi(the bnn), Chan Yewching(the bitch), Sim Ruyan(the gl) and Triscilla Tan(KKKKKKK)!! I LOVE YOU GUYS! At least this year's birthday is not as fucked up as last time. You guys let me know that true friends care. Even at hardest times, you guys will pull me through. So suckers, don't give fucking excuses to not care for your friends. If I don't see the sincerity, that's it. You're done with me. OUTTA MY LIFE, BITCH. Okay! Chillzxc. My birthday okay!! (L)

Anyway, it really disappoint me, bastard.
Didn't, you didn't.
Not a single word, not a single letter.
Please, just hold your hand with Mr. Chan and jump down the building.
Because you're a failure in life.
Through all these, it seems to me that history repeats itself.
You came to know me, then you ignored and leave.
Then you came back again, and now you're going to be gone forever.
Maybe after all these 'wars' (as you might said),
I might not even see you in my life again.
You motivated me to study hard.
Now, almost all day, I tend to sleep more so that I could dream of you.
But hardly you came, maybe you already forgotten about my presence.
I still remember the first time I saw you.
Then, how that first request that get us to know more about each other.
Seriously, I fall in love again at that time, after my fucking 2 years crush.
Okay. I know it is silly okay.. LOL.
But get to the point!
So many days and so many months passed.
You killed me without a word and action.
I receive no news of you.
You're really good at that, whore.
Now I wish ... Guess hard what is it.

Labels: HAPPY.

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title: Time flies.
date: Friday, September 10, 2010
time:11:20:00 PM

Time really pass at a high speed.

Or is it because without doing anything that contributes?

I am confuse.

I hope that I would be and will be stronger.

Pulling through all difficulty,

stand up again and prepare for my O level.

Standing up might be the hardest thing,

but forgetting is the worst.

God Bless.

P.S. I miss you a lot…

Labels: you

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title: How does it really feel.
date: Sunday, September 5, 2010
time:6:01:00 PM

What I can say is that this feeling is super sucky. It's all that I can say already. Whatever reason it is, I don't give a damn already. Even if what you did is for my own good. If you really think I am doing better than before then you're wrong. Thanks anyway.

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title: Oral.
date: Tuesday, August 17, 2010
time:11:37:00 PM

Omg. Tomorrow is my oral exam already!!! I am so scare. I don't know if I will have any confidence or not. I hope there will be no fear within me tomorrow and everything will go well with the flow. God bless.

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title: Back to Polaroid Fever
date: Sunday, August 8, 2010
time:5:02:00 PM

Okay. Firstly, I thought I am out of all this polaroid thingy.
But then, yesterday, I digged out my polaroid and looked at it.
I found myself using the PC for hours just to get more information about polaroids.
Then I found out about the Impossible File Project,
where they reproduced the polaroid films!
Omg. I really want them!
But they are super duper expensive. :/
So I switched my thought to SX-70.
The polaroid I want for ages!
But its expensive.. :/
I heard that there are several thrift shops in aus or other countries,
where you can find SX-70 at VERY cheap price... :/

JEALOUS!

Here's the web: http://shop.the-impossible-project.com/shop/

Labels: 600 films, impossible films, Polaroid, SX-70

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title: 29.07.10
date: Tuesday, August 3, 2010
time:2:08:00 PM

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title:
date: Sunday, July 25, 2010
time:11:32:00 PM

In summary:

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title: Fuck off.
date: Sunday, July 18, 2010
time:7:52:00 PM

I still remember how we used to talk.
I am not sad because of what I hear,
is what that I hadn't heard from you.

Labels: Depressed.

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title: Days when I am gone.
date: Monday, July 5, 2010
time:7:01:00 PM

Its been real long since I updated.
Sometimes things are just hard to predict isn't it?
You once said that you would protect someone and be his/her guardian angel.
Did you do it?
You once said you love a person.
Did you really love him/her?
You once said that feelings can be poured between friends.
Did you really do that?
You once said everything is gonna be alright.
Did you really mean it or is it just another lie?
Sometimes bullshit just gets in your way and you can't get rid of them.
Sometimes we just made an empty promise that we don't even realize.
So who can we blame?
We can't blame us that we made an empty promise without knowing.
Nor we can blame the God who made us.
Cause everything happen for a reason, or maybe not.
Just coincidence, I guess.
I don't believe in fate.
Thankyou.

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title: 3DS LIVE Press Conference!
date: Wednesday, June 16, 2010
time:1:32:00 AM

I am never gonna regret this man!
Their first time presenting and letting people to see the 3DS!
God shit bricks!
Still can't find the photo of the new 3DS. :/
But I gonna tell you how cool it is!
It can take photos like DSi but in 3D!
That means it have 3 cameras! (2 at the cover and 1 on top of the screen!)
And the games you played on it is all 3D!
The coolest thing of all is that you can experience the 3D without wearing any glasses!!!
Isn't it like cool?!
And there are more new features for us to find out! :D
Like the new scroll control, motion sensor thingy etc.
WOW! Cool! I hope they have milky White Edition..
But I bet I cannot even afford..

Labels: COOL.

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